Happy Father’s Day, Daddy-o!!

I don't know about you, but my Dad is AWESOME. It’s nice to spoil the man largely responsible for making me who I am today. I'm so proud of my Dad. He does so much more for me than I ever could have asked for, and he's always been there for me no matter what. He'd stand by me in any pinch and he'd listen to whatever I had to say. Over the years we've had more than several very good discussions. Here recently we even embarked on a Daddy/Daughter travel vacation chock full of good times, good talks, good everythings. I hope all of you out there with stand-up Dad's like mine took some time to really say thanks and to let him know he's appreciated. Having a strong, dependable, "look up to"-able father is so important. And no matter how old I get, I'll always be Daddy's Little Girl.

I LOVE YOU, Dad! Thanks for being everything you are, and for always being there for me. For putting a roof over my head, for putting cool gadgets in my hand, and being an all-around awesome man. You've taught me more than you could ever know—and that doesn't look to change any time soon. I'm always learning new things from you. I love you so much, World's Greatest Dad!

To the man who never gets tired of supporting all my silly ideas, who has loved me from the beginning and who still gives me awesome gifts even if I’m ‘pasaway’ and screw up big time and who I’m sure will love me forever. I’m lucky to have the coolest dad ever. I may be a lady now but I will always and forever be your little girl! HAPPY FATHER’S DAY, Daddy-o!! And all the awesome daddies out there.

My Open Letter to the YOU who will makes my heart beat just a little faster

I was inspired to write this open letter because of this video shared by my friend in Facebook. OMG!! This just made me cry and touch my heart. Everyone needs to watch this coz’ these things are rarely seen in today’s time. Amazing! :)

“True love is not like Romeo and Juliet who died together, but true love is like Lolo and Lola who grow old together.”

I suppose you are wondering why I got being cheesy and why I’m writing this. Don’t worry, I’m wondering that too! It seemed like a good idea of something to do right now, and I can’t sleep yet, so here I am.

I don’t normally write to YOU, I think I have a dozens of never-ending thoughts in my head…but this one is here and permanent and I think I look forward to you reading it someday. So, be ready for lotsss of cheezy-ish here. Hihihi :)))

I’m doing this…while A Rocket to the Moon playlist ‘Somebody Out There’ on repeat in the background…for the sake of…I don’t know… I have this romanticized version of what we – this…just want to do this…whatever this is – ought to be. I’m not in like or even inlove with someone and I’m not seeing anyone right now. It’s totally single and ready to mingle…Single, single you might say. I really want to take my time and enjoy the single, single life, but sometimes I can’t help but to want being with someone, who else doesn’t want, eh? So, here’s to my future You. Sometimes it makes me wonder…Are you actually trying to find me, or am I really just hard to find? I hope you never get tired of looking for me…

Dear my Future YOU,

What’s up, ketchup?

Obviously, you are reading this point because you have passed my ‘high standard’ first round assessment with flying colors. So, you are respectful, witty, funny, protective, love me and of course, charming and attractive -- like me! Ayiiiieee!! :)) So here we are, in a serious committed relationship.

I want you to think of this letter as a sort of, anticipations cheat lists. Featuring a mix of my idiosyncrasies and weirdness and your boyfriend duties to me. So, expect this to be lengthy and cheesy. :)

Before I meet you I don’t know if I want you right now but I want you to know that I’m here, I exist. I been wanting to write to you but I just don’t know what to say! Haha :) it’s hard especially I do not know who you are, I’m just using this creative imagination of mine but I know you’re somewhere out there preparing yourself to be my coolest boyfriend. ^_^

You might find it weird and lame but I’m waiting for you while enjoying the life that I don’t want to miss. Maybe you’re still busy and so do I. We can work this out I know, we let go the why’s. I wonder what you’re doing right now. I don’t wonder this in a creepy way – I think it’s more so in an intrigued way.

Sometimes I think about you! :D Did we bump into each other that day in the mall? Sometimes I wonder if I’ve already passed you on the street; stood beside you in the waiting area, sit beside you in a public transportation. Could you have been on that bus I missed by a second? Sometimes I wonder if I won’t meet you for another year…or if I’ll meet you tomorrow while chillin’ in Starbucks or sippin’ my large milk tea. Could it be you’re scared to find me? I would never hurt you. Are you one of my friends or friends of friends? And suddenly, I’d see you’ve been here the entire time, surely not. You can’t be.

I may not be your love at first sight or not the first girl you love, you kiss and dance with but I promise that I will be the last, forever! ♥ :) I have reserved all the depths of my heart for you. I have secrets that I have guarded only to share with you. This fact alone will tell you that I never doubted the fact that you were yet to enter my life one day. :)

Now, that your face, your facial features, your personality, your smell and your heart, I already know all of that and loved you when the time you read this. :)) You love me; you inspire me, and make me want to be a better person.

I hope you love my insecurities and obsessions on books, movies, TV shows and etc. I promise you I will love you for that. Please, be faithful to me! I don’t want to worry about everything related to how your heart feels about me. It takes a lot for me to commit these days, so I decide to commit to you, I’ll deem you worthy. I won’t mess that up. I hope you’ll deem me worthy as well.

Don’t worry about your flaws. I know you’re not perfect and I will love you for that. I myself also have an endless list of it. We may not get rid of it but I know we will get used to it to the point of laughing it off. We will be the world’s COOLEST COUPLE in the world!! ♥ :) And, the happiest one too!! :D We’ll just laugh at everything that will come not only in our relationship but also in our individual lives as well.

I hope you’re a big sports fan too. You know I’m a NBA Lakers fan. I super love Kobe Bryant! I can be the “yeller at TV” for the both of us if you want --- I get into it. I will not want you to “shush” me. I’ll want you to giggle to yourself and think it’s cute that I just cursed out an electronic black rectangle on the table or a coach who will never hear me. Better yet, I hope you’re yelling too. I want you to love my parents, my family and vice versa.

I want you to be my bestfriend as well. Someone I can talk to, share secrets, act silly with and even gossip with! Someone that will always be by my side and won't allow me to cry myself to sleep again. Someone I can always count on.

I am so excited for our adventures together, travelling to strange places, Christmas with my family and your family. I don’t want the over PDA thing when we’re out. Hehe Just holding my hand in public would suffice. Holding it tight but gently would be enough for me.

Please, don’t break my heart. Don’t promise me broken promises. If we run into your ex-girlfriend, I hope you know I’ll be the coolest girl. Unless, she comes up to us begging for you to back, we’ll cross the bridge if we get there. *insert evil laugh* Hahaha :))

Oh, and I want to be silly. I love photos! I like taking pictures. I need you to be cool with taking ugly, beautiful and wackiest pictures on my itouch and laughing at them later. We pig-out and never say never. Travel and shop like there’s forever. Laugh and cry and days will never be darker. After fights we’ll be saying sorry, and then we’d kiss and hug each other tightly.

Let this relationship make us grow as a person. And also, let us help one another to be steadfast in our faith. (I have confidence in this because God won't give me a non-believer for a boyfriend. Nor will I ever allow anyone to be.) We will be as committed to God as we were even before this relationship. We will date hard. And worship Him harder!

Oh my dear YOU! I know with all my heart that I will know you when I see you and get to know you. I may have dozens and dozens of crushes, but you will always be the one to put butterflies in my tummy and makes my heart beat faster. Soo, keep that in mind! Don’t be jealous! Okay?! :)) I know that you will be unexpected and unmatched by all those before, those men who tried and failed to win this heart of mine. I hope that you will find the HAPPINESS in me. I wish you could love me endlessly. We will keep the spark or even the fire. You will be my LIFETIME CRUSH and SPECIAL ONE so you don’t care to be jealous! ♥ :)

Am I too demanding?? I hope not! Hehe :)) I want there to be a reason you begin your day with me on your mind and end it just the same. I want you to do all of the above because I will also do all the above for you. Everyday. A thousand times over. “WE” and “US”. You want me, I want you. Together at last. Soon I’ll be seeing you…

XOXO, C. ♥ :)

And I’ll stop here…so many thoughts still flowing in my head but I’ll save that when I meet that “you” one day, maybe very soon…Where are you? For now, dear, I give up. And while I wait, maybe I’ll find me instead. I will find that You who really means the world to me and will fall in love with him, and he will love me to bits. He won’t find anyone else like me if he could search the world forever and ever. I will find that You who won’t want to leave my side. He might not be in my life yet: he might have walked past me today, he might have walked outside my house a few hours ago, but one day, he’ll be mine and only mine forever and ever.

There’s somebody out there who’s looking for you .Someday he’ll find you, I swear that it’s true.

Feelings We Need Words For

From THOUGHT CATALOG by P. Luna

This. Beautifully stated.

English is so bad at describing what it means to grieve. We use words like bereft or bitter or sad, or we say we have a broken heart. But none of these really get at the nuances. The words don’t seem to capture each exquisitely painful feeling.

For example, there should be a word, maybe borrowed from German, a language so good at expressing complicated mental states in a single lengthy word with many chewy consonants, for when you miss someone so incredibly, achingly much, when that person pervades every thought, every interaction, every waking moment, but you also loathe them. Because they treated you badly, or because they were too weak to be honest with you. Because you were betrayed. And because you loathe them, you hate yourself for missing that person so intensely. For missing the laughter they inspired; for wishing for the easy intimacy that you built. You hate yourself for knowing that they aren’t worth so much sadness, that such an outlay of mental energy is entirely wasted and useless. But you feel it anyway, and you cry in the shower or into your pillow or anytime something reminds you of that person. Which is all the time. There should definitely be a word for that.

There should also be a word, maybe from the French, who do existentialism so well, for the feeling of disconnection you cultivate when you walk through the streets with your headphones on, sad songs blasting into your ears loudly enough that you can pretend you are alone. You pass by other people almost without seeing them, since you can’t hear them. You walk by shops and offices on the sidewalk, going somewhere or maybe not going anywhere in particular, feeling like the music in your ears is a soundtrack to your sadness. This song makes you think of that person; that song comes close to capturing how lonely you are without them. You isolate yourself physically because you feel so isolated inside; surrounded by people, you are still alone, because you have been abandoned by that one person who made you feel somehow less alone.

English is also missing a word for how it feels when you know that person has moved on so quickly. When you find out you weren’t as important as you thought you were. When you realize that they were acting selfishly instead of caring about you, or when you understand that you didn’t really come into it at all for them, they were just doing what they needed to do. Maybe it should come from Russian, because the Russians know despair. You thought you were finally getting over them. You could almost go an hour, if you were busy with something really important, without thinking about them. Then you see a Facebook post or hear some gossip from mutual friends, and you realize you weren’t over it. Not even close. You realize you were still holding out hope that you would get back together, that there would be some way to repair the damage, to be happy again. When that hope is crushed, the fragile Jenga tower of your life tumbles down. There should be a word for that kind of defeat.

And there should also be a word for when you’re just so tired of being sad, for when you are tired of being lonely but somehow don’t know how to stop. When you’re tired of crying, tired of thinking about that person, tired of missing them. You can’t yet make yourself recognize all the bad things; remembering how you’ve been done wrong doesn’t help. But the hurt over the good things, the things you still miss so much, is a dull twist in your stomach now, instead of a gaping hole in your chest. You don’t know how to turn that off, don’t remember how to be happy. But you sort of remember happiness as it existed before that person, and you want that so desperately. You want to stop this misery that drags at your ankles and eyes and insides. You know it will take time, but sometimes just the fact of being tired of crying makes you cry. Maybe we could co-opt a word from Japanese for that, since melancholy is a specialty of theirs.

There should be an English word for all these feelings of grief. And I desperately wish they existed now, just so I could tell you, next time you ask, how I’m doing in only four words, instead of all these.

Book Review: The Lover's Dictionary by David Levithan

SUMMARY from Amazon:

How does one talk about love? Do we even have the right words to describe something that can be both utterly mundane and completely transcendent, pulling us out of our everyday lives and making us feel a part of something greater than ourselves? Taking a unique approach to this problem, the nameless narrator of David Levithan’s The Lover’s Dictionary has constructed the story of his relationship as a dictionary. Through these short entries, he provides an intimate window into the great events and quotidian trifles of being within a couple, giving us an indelible and deeply moving portrait of love in our time.

REVIEW:

If there really is a manual or dictionary about love, will it even make a difference? Everyone knows love is complex and complicated. Writing about love is never an easy task, much more define it but having it described by someone who can really write is somehow infinitely comforting. I first became aware of this book through friends on twitter wherein they retweeted those words that I know with not literally the meaning of those words and became curious enough to want to read it too.

This is the first David Levithan book I have ever read and I must admit it has whetted my appetite for more. Rather than complete the book review I've been working on, I decided to write one about the book I just finished instead. I literally just finished it in less than an hour in one sitting today, but will take considerably less so to write the review.

“An entire relationship narrated through a series of dictionary entries?! There’s no way reading a dictionary can be interesting,” I thought. But curiosity got the better of me, and I popped into the net searching an epub file and downloaded a copy on my iBooks.

When I first heard about David Levithan's, The Lover's Dictionary, I wanted to read it only because of the clever idea behind the book. I love anything that involves wordplay. I loved the idea that this book is told using dictionary words. Each page starts with a word dictionary style, and that's the format for the whole book which tells the story of a couple.

The Lover's Dictionary tells the story of a couple in short, dictionary entries. The couple's story is told slightly out of order, and left unnamed by the author, but it's easy enough to follow along. A series of random words from A to Z each is representing something about the protagonist's relationship. Through carefully-chosen words, their love story unfold: how they first met, how their rocky relationship evolved into something more solid, from their first date up to the time they finally live together, the ups and downs of their relationship. The narrator, who is a guy based on the entries is a writer while the girl seemed like an untamed, whimsical and quirky character who seems to have charmed our narrator. But as their relationship goes on, it gets harder for the both of them, and we readers are left wondering if they decide to stay together or part.

And even though their story is nothing exceptional, a love story not all that different from the next boy-girl relationship there ever is, the unique manner in which their story was told gave it such an unconventional flavor and offbeat feel, and it was for this reason that I loved it to bits.

There is not much I can really say about this story since it’s very short. Often, I found myself pausing to really think about the situations in the story, and the deceptively simple way in which Levithan redefines an array of words…even everyday words which are seemingly mundane.

Overall, I really liked this book. Unique is to describe since this is the first time I read a book in a dictionary form. It reminded me of the movie 500 days of summer (I think most of you guys have already watched the film), not only because of the arrangement, but because of the men in both story and how they were able to survive in a relationship where their women loved them less than they deserve. It is true that the entries were just windows of what is really happening to the main characters, as if I were a nosy person peeking at them whenever I hear something inside their apartment. The feeling of knowing everything with just a short entry is what makes this book amazing. I love how Levithan constructed his entries. Sometimes sweet and sometimes sad, the book shows how the relationship between the narrator and his live in partner started and how it began to fall apart.

The writing in is beautiful and often funny, too. Wait, let me try again, HIS WRITING IS MAGNIFICENT. I'm still reluctant to call this book a novel, because to me it didn't really feel like one. It's very short and took me only less than an hour to finish. Your vocabulary will probably grow a bit. The format is very unique and creative. It is like a dictionary running from A to Z and definitions. The most interesting thing here is that these definitions are not literally straight forward definitions you see in English dictionaries, but short entries telling short stories that the narrator associate with the words. It feels like you’re reading a personal diary. I wasn't sure that it would be possible for it to have a real plot, since it was told in these entries - but it really did. Sure, it wasn't a very complicated plot, but there was a plot nonetheless, and I kept turning the pages, wanting to find out what happened with the couple.

Let me share with you of my favorite entries from the book. These made me feel shivery and fluttery inside and, well, in love:

This short book makes you stop and take notice of the words that choose to describe each other, our lives, and love. It is heartfelt, honest, and raw; hallmarks of a true romance. It's the kind that can make you feel all kinds of emotions. I think it's pretty amazing how David Levithan uses so few words but the feelings and images come out so different. Loved that! The emotions and problems and events in this story feel so real and are described like they really are. It can go from happy-in-love to heartbreaking to bittersweet to frustrated and then to happy-in-love again.

Another one of my favorite entries:

This novel takes more of a real life approach and examines how confusing relationships can get. I wish the book was longer. The ending was open ended, but I like it that way. I like it because though it was open ended, I kind of know what will happen next already. This book is a unique work of art. Definitely a favorite. I'm sure I'm going to pick this book up again to reread, especially in random -- just open to a page and read. This book also makes me wonder: if I were to make a dictionary of my own love life, what words would I use?

Nonetheless, my own love life is still nonexistent. Not yet, anyway. However, The Lover's Dictionary affirms things that I know, based from stories, reading and yes, even on some experiences. Relationships are messy, it takes a lot of work and it would hurt both parties a lot...but it allow me to believe that even so, relationships can be beautiful at the same time. :)

In fact, I have a habit of skimming it and reading an entry. It is not just a story of two people in a relationship, it is also what it was; a dictionary about love. Whether you're a romantic or not, I recommend The Lover's Dictionary by David Levithan. I'm sure you'll find a bit of yourself in one of the entries in this dictionary. It is a must read for people in a relationship. I know even in a small way, it will help them.

Also of note, Levithan is one of the authors of Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist, so if that’s your thing, you should check this out. And it’s incredibly quick to read…coming in at just over 200 pages, with one brief dictionary entry per page, you could probably finish it in less than an hour. What are you still doing here? Go read it! Go, go, go!

**All the pics I posted are from the screenshots on my iBooks so that I can highlights those lines in every entries I liked. :))**

Book Review: Me Before You by Jojo Moyes

*SUMMARY from Penguin:

Lou Clark knows lots of things. She knows how many footsteps there are between the bus stop and home. She knows she likes working in The Buttered Bun tea shop and she knows she might not love her boyfriend Patrick.

What Lou doesn't know is she's about to lose her job or that knowing what's coming is what keeps her sane.

Will Traynor knows his motorcycle accident took away his desire to live. He knows everything feels very small and rather joyless now and he knows exactly how he's going to put a stop to that. What Will doesn't know is that Lou is about to burst into his world in a riot of colour. And neither of them knows they're going to change the other for all time.

REVIEW:

“The thing about being catapulted into a whole new life - or at least shoved up so hard against someone else's life that you might as well have your face pressed against their window - is that it forces you to rethink your idea of who you are. Or how you might seem to other people.”

If you have read my past book reviews, you would know by now that the following post might contain some spoilers. WARNING!! So stop now if you want to actually read the book for yourself. Okay I heard about this book a while back, I always meant to get it but as soon as I added it to my TBR list I guess it kind of got lost in the other books. But I finally downloaded it and of course did not start it right away, but luckily saw a friend review about it urged me to read it saying it was an amazing story. So of course I picked it up, and wow it did not disappoint me! I don't often cry while reading books. I just sniffled on some books I’ve read but I find I very rarely have extreme emotional reactions while reading books. And yet, I cried while reading it.

There are books that you cannot put down. There are also books where you become so invested in the characters, you force yourself to stop reading to prolong the experience because you don’t want the story to end, and that’s what can happen when you read Jojo Moyes, “Me Before You.” The title doesn't really give a clue about what the book is about. Also, I want to say that the cover does not do this book justice. The pink book cover gives off a sappy, chick-lit vibe when in reality this is a heartbreaking story. Me Before You is NOT a romance nor is it romantic, at least not in the traditional sense of the meaning despite what the blurbs on the silly front cover claim. It is however a very moving and thought provoking love story. How wrong can you be! Never judge a book by its cover is a lesson I am having difficulty learning.

This is the story of Will Traynor and Louisa (Lou) Clark. Will is a very successful businessman with a gorgeous girlfriend and the whole wide world at his feet. He lost all this when he got hit by a motorcycle and became a quadriplegic. Someone who is paralyzed from the neck down with some slight movement in his head and fingers. He became trapped inside his own ‘wheelchair’. He loses everything after his accident and has no reason to live anymore. He’s doesn’t want to be in pain. He wants an out of this miserable life. Until he meets her, Louisa Clark.

Lou is a twenty-seven year old who never got to really live. Afraid of life, she always stayed in her comfort zone and didn't even leave the small town she grew up in. Desperate for the money to support her parents and her sister, she takes on a job as a carer. She never anticipated for Will to show her the beauty of life and give her new horizons.

When the two of them meet, they don't start off that great. It has been two years since Will's accident, trapped inside his own body, feeling claustrophobic every second of the day; he just wants to end it all. After a failed suicide attempt, his mother finally concedes in helping him end his life in a clinic that specializes in euthanasia. All his mother wants is six more months with him and he decides to give her just that. His mother hires Lou to keep him company for those six months. He can't help but answer every single one of Lou's questions in a sarcastic manner. This strangely brought a smile on my face, because some of his comments were just damn funny. Slowly they start getting used to each other and they even start liking each other.

That is until she finds out Will’s plan to commit suicide and makes it her life mission to everything it takes to change his mind. A life with day to day struggles but a life worth living nonetheless. Together they teach each other that life is to vulnerable to waste. She decides to give him a reason to live and to show him that life can be good.

What happens in this six month time period is the heart of this story. It is about two families and how they deal with what life has dealt them. It is about choices and being allowed to choose. It is about awakening and discovering life and all there is to take from it and not be afraid to really love and live.

Me Before You, broke my heart. In fact, I only just finished the book at 1am this morning - but I swear, this book really hits you in the heart. This is a book that has you hooked from the first page and just won't let you go. The first few chapters of this book seemed so disappointingly predictable. While reading this first chapter, I was certain I had this book pegged right up until the very end. On top of that, this novel is about a subject that makes me very uncomfortable: assisted suicide.

However, I kept reading, and was rewarded. First of all, the novel engages in from more details of quadriplegic life. The constant pain and infections, the medical risks, and the innumerable tests and medications and procedures and equipment that are (and will always be) required maintaining the bare minimum standard of life for Will.

Soon enough you will find yourself getting rather emotionally invested in the lives of your two new favorite characters, Lou and Will. Seriously, you will! Or at least I did. The characters are so interesting and I liked them so much I had to know what was going to happen next. I mean it, I had so many questions swirling around in my head: Would Lou blossom into a more confident and self-assured woman? What happened to her in the maze? Would Will decide to forgo the plans he had made in Switzerland? What types of adventures would Lou take Will on? And, how long would it take for them both to realize how in love they were with one another? This isn’t an extraordinary book or one that captivated me with its poetic language; it’s just a very good story about a man and a woman and how they affected each others’ lives.

Me Before You is such an amazing, tear-jerker book. It will have you thinking about life, love, death, and everything in between. It sounds like a cliché to say things like 'I couldn't put it down' and 'it made me laugh and cry' but this book truly did both. And, you will be left with a sadness that will inspire you step back and take a look at your own life. It also pushed me to recognize the ways in which I've become rather satisfied within my own life. I urge you to pick up this book as your first read - you won't be disappointed.

I connected with Lou and Will on such a deep level that by the end of the book. I very much believe in love and sacrifice and to read a book that handles that kind of emotion with such intensity and yet such tenderness truly softens my heart. I cried at many points whilst reading and I literally sobbed my heart out at the end. This book was and IS worth it.

The characters begin as likeable, yet maddeningly realistic in all their egocentricities. As their fears and insights are exposed, they develop in strength and purpose to reveal rich individuals who are all irreversibly changed through the events which unfold. I enjoyed the first person POV, and the odd change in character thrown in stirred the narrative nicely for me. Even though the book is written in first person (from Lou’s perspective), there are four chapters written from four other characters’ perspectives and yes, it works here. The author clearly informs the reader that a different character is narrating this chapter and seeing the situation as viewed by another character added to my overall understanding of Lou and Will and their relationship. I would have liked to have had at least a chapter from Will's perspective. I was really glad to have read Will's letter though!

The plot is relatively simple yet not complicated for all that it raises some ethical questions. How can you read this and not ask yourself what you might do in similar circumstances, how you would feel if it was your friend or loved one?

I cannot tell you how much this story touched me. And yet, it moved me, really moved me. When an author can invoke a readers emotions, someone who can make you feel genuinely sad when the characters are sad and make you feel genuinely happy when the characters are happy. It’s just an amazing feeling so thank you Ms. Moyes. It dealt with so many different issues and was so thought-provoking. Every character had a story of its own. It wasn't just Lou and Will. It was everything and nothing. It was life. The good and the bad.

"Some mistakes...just have greater consequences than others. But you don’t have to let that night be the thing that defines you.”

It really is extraordinary, and it will make you cry. I cried my eyes out. I not only cried but laughed, smiled, and learned things I didn't know before. It taught me a better understanding of being grateful of what I do have. This is a story about life and love. It's about being alive, but not living. When your body can't do what your mind is screaming for, how do you cope? Will love be enough to ignore the pain you feel every day?

“Live boldly. Push yourself. Don’t settle. Wear those stripy legs with pride.”

“Just live well. Just live.”

I loved this book. It’s sweet and funny and sad and deceptively simple. The friendship and romance between Will and Lou is bittersweet. The writing is beautifully written, smooth and effortless and yet the result is a story which is invested with so much emotion, with such sensitivity, that I can't help but still be a little bit in love with this book. And yet, the ending broke me into a million pieces.

I highly recommend it. It’s not for everyone, and some people may hate the way the book ends, but I thought it was well-written and heartwarming. Moyes gives us a story that has a deep, emotional plot and shares it in a way that at times made me laugh and smile, and frown and sob. Equally. The story itself is so amazingly told and the characters will pull you in from page one.

There is so much I could say, but I know I would simply ramble on and on about how wonderfully written this book is, how the characters affected me, how the story broke my heart. Life is what you make of it, and I realized that I need to start making more of it. I suppose I should send Moyes' my thank you for this book, because not only did it touch me, it also inspired me. I smiled, I laughed and I cried buckets of joyful and heart wrenching tears. But the tears were worth it.

I'm going to be leaving things right here for all those of you who haven't read this story yet. I don't want to ruin anything or take away from the story. So, all I am going to say is that you must read this novel - I promise you will not be disappointed! Read it with a big mug of tea and a box of tissues. :’)

Book Review: Safe Haven by Nicholas Sparks

*SUMMARY from Goodreads:

Love hurts. There is nothing as painful as heartbreak. But in order to learn to love again, you must learn to trust again.

When a mysterious young woman named Katie appears in the small North Carolina town of Southport, her sudden arrival raises questions about her past. Beautiful yet self-effacing, Katie seems determined to avoid forming personal ties until a series of events draws her into two reluctant relationships: one with Alex, a widowed store owner with a kind heart and two young children; and another with her plainspoken single neighbor, Jo. Despite her reservations, Katie slowly begins to let down her guard, putting down roots in the close-knit community and becoming increasingly attached to Alex and his family.

But even as Katie begins to fall in love, she struggles with the dark secret that still haunts and terrifies her...a past that set her on a fearful, shattering journey across the country, to the sheltered oasis of Southport. With Jo’s empathic and stubborn support, Katie eventually realizes that she must choose between a life of transient safety and one of riskier rewards... and that in the darkest hour, love is the only true safe haven.

*REVIEW:

Hey guys! It’s been a while since I’ve done a book review. Today I’d like to review a book I just finished a couple of days ago, Safe Haven by Nicholas Sparks. Romantic? Cheesy? Cheesier? From the tearjerker ‘A Walk to Remember’ to the classic-epic ‘The Notebook’ to the downright depressing ‘Dear John’, to the new ‘Safe Haven’.

I am a self-proclaimed Nicholas Sparks fan. :) Without Nicholas Sparks I would never have added North Carolina in my list to travel to or walked down the aisle at my wedding to a guitar-violin playing “Only Hope” (just like in A Walk to Remember). Although I’ve only read couple of Nicholas Sparks’s books, and the few I haven't read are on my to-read list. I’ve watched enough of his movies to know that I’m a fan of his storytelling. I know, I know. Nicholas Sparks’ stories are cheesy. They are all set in a similar, small, southern town, and for the most part, they follow this predictable storyline…Boy meets girl, Boy falls in love with girl, For some reason, boy and girl split up, Boy and girl get back together, Boy and girl live happily ever after…. But I LOVE these cheesy stories. I love curling up on the couch with one of Sparks’ books or popping in a Sparks’ movie in my DVD player, and knowing exactly what I’m going to get.

I gotta warn you, there might be some spoilers following. Maybe this would be a good place to shout SPOILER ALERT! because, as in all my book and movie reviews, I can't be stopped from giving away too much things happened. So, if you don't want to know, then stop reading now and come back later (if you want to). :D

But on to the discussion.

Not too far into the story, I realized that this book was...different. Although it had all the hallmarks of a Nicholas Sparks tearjerker - an aura of sadness, and a safe, sleepy North Carolina town - it also had shadow of darkness.

Safe Haven is a really brilliant love story; we see love, fear, friendship, family and a controversial issue of domestic abuse, introducing us to Katie, a girl who has rocked up in Southport leaving people wondering where she’s come from. She is being hunted however, and life might not always be happy or safe. She catches the eye of Alex, not only because she is beautiful, but because she looks scared. He is owner of the biggest store in Southport, finds himself wondering about Katie, and the two slowly get to know each other. Alex used to be in the CID department of the Army and had learnt to read people.

Another person who befriends Katie is her new neighbor, Jo. Between Jo and Alex they bring Katie out of her shell and eventually, as she falls in love with Alex, she reveals what she is running from. The story follows her and Alex as they fall in love and Katie slips into the family, spending time with Alex and his children.

Around halfway through the book Katie reveals her real name and tells the story of her marriage, and her husband Kevin. What I liked is that after that we then follow Kevin’s story as well. I was intrigued that he regularly quoted Bible verses. I did like that both sides of the story were told, it added depth and meaning to the story. There were darker undertones to the novel, and I thought Sparks handled them sensitively. I’d guessed Katie’s secret, it’s well written and it didn’t necessarily bother me that I already knew. I don’t want to give too much away because although I knew what was going to happen and I’d guessed it, I still enjoyed the way Sparks presented it and there were many little surprises I enjoyed learning as I was reading. The novel is probably predictable in more ways than one, but for me, I got into it easily from the first page and I constantly wanted to pick it up and read yet another chapter.

I found the characters to be very well presented and very easy to like. I liked the characters, especially Katie and Alex. I loved how delicate they were at the beginning. Katie grabbed me from page one, with her hesitancy and her want for secrecy. Her life isn’t perfect and she isn’t perfect but I liked how direct she was. I also really loved Alex. It was so easy to feel sympathy to him as his wife had passed away…I found his kids Josh and Kristen to be totally adorable; I’m not that a fan of children but I could have totally kidnapped those two as they were so sweet. Her only friend, Jo, a grief counselor who lives in the neighboring cottage. I was incredibly surprised about what I learned about her and I liked her too. The one character I didn’t like in any way was Kevin. He was an awful, awful person. Memorable, very memorable, but horrible. I don't feel at all bad saying that he deserved what happened to him in the end.

L-R: Noah Lomaz (Josh), Julianne Hough (Katie), Mimi Kirkland (Kristen) and Josh Duhamel ( Alex)

Dave Lyons as Kevin Tierney

Cobie Smulders as Jo

In one scene where Alex gives a sealed letter from her wife to Katie or, as she puts it, to the woman he chooses. This is where things get a little weird. Katie's about to open the letter, alone at her house, when she notices that Jo's house is completely deserted and ramshackle-looking, as if no one has lived there in years. Before Katie even opens the letter she begins to think about her times with Jo. In a burst of the sixth sense-like clarity, Katie (and I) realized the obvious - that Jo was the ghost of Alex's wife. Well the truth about Jo truly knocked me for a loop. It was something I didn't see coming, and it was actually that secret that had me in tears more than the rest of the story. I had known there was something off about Jo but had chalked it up to her being one of those nosy, meddlesome friend characters. I was also a little creeped out. Jo's letter to Katie is every bit as heartrending as you'd expect it to be. Sparks pulls out all the stops with his signature story-telling device - the letter. It adds a whole new dimension to the kind of love triangle between spouse, deceased spouse, and new lover.

Finding out Katie's secret though, I pretty much saw that one coming, and had already guessed that it would lead to some kind of explosive encounter towards the end of the book...and it did. The character of Kevin made me squirm and feel disgusted, and I really wanted to reach through my iPod screen and kill the guy. So excellent job at creating this horrid and nasty character. He definitely falls into the villain category.

Anyway, I haven’t watched the film adaptation yet, but, I am looking forward to seeing it. I can already see a few changes they've made, based on watching the trailer. In the book Katie starts out as a blonde and then dyes her hair to become a brunette, but in the movie it shows her as starting off as a brunette and then becoming a blonde. Okay, not a huge change really but still it could have remained true to the story. Also, in the book Alex is described as being one of those younger men who goes grey prematurely, but in the movie he has a nice brown hair. Come on, again, it is a small detail, but they could have done it. There are a few other minor stories and plot details I noticed have changed, but I can't make a full comparison until I actually see the movie.

I thoroughly enjoyed Safe Haven. The ending is very fast-paced and I found myself constantly reading, reading, and reading so I could finish it and see how it was all going to end. It was frantic and I just couldn’t put it down. Nicholas Sparks is a hugely enjoyable author. I love his books and movies. There’s no shame that he’s a romance author, his love stories are traditional and I can see why he’s so popular and why a lot of his novels are made into movies. Safe Haven was just a wonderful read; it made me believe in love (corny, right?). I liked that Safe Haven eschewed all of the normal love story rules. Katie and Alex’s relationship progresses at a nice, steady pace. There are so few traditional love stories in Romance Lit that Nicholas Sparks provides a nice distraction. He always seems to have something sad in them but even so they are amazing!

The ending of the book was so exciting! Kevin came and chased Katie. I was hooked and couldn’t put the book down once he discovered where she was. The ending was tense, but really good. There was a twist that I didn’t see coming and I enjoyed the ending. I was satisfied and gripped until the end.

So overall, this is a must read story. This is a great book. I think Sparks dealt with the issue of domestic abuse and death very well. The characters were so easy to like. It has it all. The love story, the suspense, and a little bit of a 'wow factor' which is how I like to call it. I'm not going to spoil it but Jo is the wow factor in this story. I absolutely recommend this book. I believe you won't be disappointed. All I can say in the end is thank you Nicholas for this incredible story. I can’t recommend this book enough.

Here’s a sweet glimpse of its film adaptation:

Love is when...

Reblogged from Thought Catalog. I just enjoyed reading this. This is so well-written! I personally love the use of extreme almost grotesque images to capture the intensity of raw love. It is the same as how I feel about love. That even when I'm grumpy and frumpy and down, all I want is to be with him. But I also don't because I don't want him to see me sad. And yet, he is what makes me better."I hate everything as much as I love you." Great line in a great thing.

Love is when... by Kat George

I guess love is when I’m super cranky because I’ve got my period, and I’m sitting on the bed when you get home from work and even though I’m so relieved to see you, I scowl at you and complain that my belly hurts. I won’t cuddle you when you come and sit on the edge of the bed, even though all I really want to do is crawl inside you and wear your skin as a coat and your guts as a scarf, because love is gross and creepy like that. I have my period and my tummy hurts and I love you so much I want to slap you in the face.

I’ll grunt at you instead of answering your questions and I’ll be relieved when you leave the room and shut the door behind you, because I love you so much, and you should never have to receive me when I’m like this. When I’m like this I should be shackled to a wall and fed gruel that’s been slopped on the ground in front of me, and my hands should be tied behind my back so that I have to lap it up from the dirty floor with my tongue.

I guess love is when you come back, 15 minutes later, and you’ve been down to the off license and bought me my favorite biscuits, you know, the Weston’s Digestives with the chocolate on one side, even though it’s cold in the street and we’re poor and have no money to pay our rent. The way you come back to me, with the packet of biscuits in one hand and a cup of tea in the other, the way you come so silently and put these things next to me, the way you walk across the room without even displacing the air you’re moving through, makes me ashamed that you have to love someone that can be such a horrible little troll.

But still, I love you so much I am too embarrassed to apologise, and I continue to sit there with my arms crossed and my bottom lip out. I won’t even turn my head to face you, but I can see the biscuits laying on the bed between us, as you take up your position next to me, leaning against the brick wall because I’ve got all the pillows and I’m too stubborn and surly to take one. I think I love you more as we sit there, me obstinate and you so calm, a ringmaster waltzing boldly into a lion’s den.

And then without warning, my eyes lap with waves and I’m ready to look at you and say I’m sorry for being such a brat, it’s just that I feel so horrible, and I hate it here sometimes, in this tiny mouse infested apartment, their little droppings sometimes between the sheets of our mattress that lives on the floor. I hate that my tummy hurts, I hate that we don’t have a living room in our flat, that we can’t afford to go to a restaurant. I hate everything as much as I love you.

So you squeeze my hand and you say, I know, and you say we can just watch Paris Hilton’s British Best Friend and you’ll bitch about all the contestants with me and even pretend like you care. I start to cry because you are the best, and I tell you I didn’t mean it, that I love our tiny mouse infested apartment, I love it here, I love it here with you and did I mention that I love you? You say we’re going to miss the start of the program and you smile at me.

We watch Paris Hilton’s British Best Friend and you have an opinion on everything, and we complain about all the contestants like they’re friends we dislike and we’re driving back from a dinner party we just had with them, and we eat the whole packet of biscuits and drink tea until my tummy doesn’t hurt anymore and we’re holding hands. When the show is over, we go to the bathroom together and brush our teeth standing side by side in front of the mirror, like we do every night since we moved here. You poke me with the frothy tip of your brush, I pretend like I think it’s gross because I know you think the face I pull when I do that is cute, and then we have an argument about whether or not we can cross swords and you swear if I sit on the toilet you can aim your wee so it gets right between my legs and none will go on me. And like every night before, and every night after, we don’t cross swords.

Before we go to bed you lay on your tummy with your shirt off and I lay on your back squeezing your blackheads, and we talk about what happened today at work. So I guess love is when we eventually lay together in the darkness, and have our ten minutes of cuddles, then both roll to our own side of the bed because neither of us can sleep while cuddling unless we’re drunk or sad and right now we’re sober and happy. You touch your big toe against mine under the sheets and we fall asleep just like this; far enough apart to fall into dreams, but pressing together regardless.

Oh so lovey-dovey day

Twenty two years of my existence yet another Valentines Day awaits me. Oh yes it's the love month already.  I bet there are already a few who are ready to the firing squad. While there are still bitter hearts out there who are sad, full of hate and regrets. February can be a good month or bad month. If you are single, you need not to skip the 14th of February. Treat this as a "single" blessing. Everyone experienced being single. Somewhere in our lives there were occasions when love & relationship were nowhere to be found. Being single is not a curse for one to carry. It is even a privilege and an opportunity. In this phase, one can improve one's self in preparation for relationship.

When I hear that "day" then, I'm kinda excited even if there's nothing really much happening in me every time that occasion arrives. I barely remember what's the best valentine I had since I can't even think of something that is nice about it for everything that happens on that day is quite the same as normal days of mine. But for singles like me, Valentine's Day is just any other day, without any bitterness and defensiveness at all. :) I know my time will come, I know he will come, in an amazingly unexpected way. :) But since it's "the season," you just cannot really avoid questions from popping from nowhere! Hahaha

Okay, I admit it. Every time I know that occasion is coming, I'm thinking of chocolates, flowers, restaurants...you name it. Things that I never experienced myself on that day…ever from a special someone. I'm a little dreamy about it which made me realize that oh...I'm still really a person. Haha! Duh! :P

Honestly (and being true to myself), I already know the answers on those, that is: it (still) depends on me. I don't know, was really single all my life, had a couple of sort of love related experiences in the past, and I knew of the feeling- it was indeed cloud nine feeling. It's such a nice feeling waking up realizing that there's someone waiting for you to wake up, asks if you are okay and is willing to end the day with you, and will choose to start another day with you.

Even if I haven't experience having that "special" person on such days I'm still excited just hearing about that day. I love watching those people doing surprises for their lover, or when I saw a guy holding a flower and those people selling those flowers. Seeing those things that makes me happy and ‘kilig’ made me thought of my “kagwapuhan”. “Kagwapuhan” is the name I call to my special guy whom I haven't found yet. Weird me! LOL :))) I kept thinking with those what ifs and then it made me realized something. It made me more excited to wait for him. It made me more excited to wait for that February month that he will finally arrive. I don't care how many valentines I should wait but if ever I had someone special "special" to spend that day, it must be him. I will not just wait of course...I'll do a lot of things while waiting :). To be honest, I'm not yet ready to face him now. I still need to work out on a lot of things.

It may seem to sound to old-y, conservative-ish; I would prefer to have a serious relationship, someone I'll spend my future and infinity with. Someone who will never give up on me, who has the persistence to win my heart. I'm not playing safe, nor being too serious, it's just that relationship for me is something long term(ed). If I would go into a relationship, I want to feel that, that person sees himself spending the rest of his life with me. I'm not being too in hurry or anything, but it's very important that you know where you stand in someone else's life. And now that I'm exploring and still testing the waters, I can't clearly see and/or feel yet what future brings in to me.

Part of me also fears. Fear that the person will hinder me to do things I love doing. Fear that he might not be supportive of me. Fear that what I like doing is something he's not interested with. And lastly, I fear that I might completely head over heels fall inlove with him, that I'm willing to give up my dreams because he said so. I'm afraid that it might happen, because certainly, it's not something far from happening. I've listened and read a lot of stories like these.

I hope the fear part will all be gone soon, and I pray that someone will be brave enough to make me feel safe. I can marry him now if he'll explore the world with me, LOL just kidding!! I believe that life partners are blessings and one of the best gifts that God gives to us, aside from our lives. And I do hope and pray that this person deserves all my love to him in the future.

A simple note, you don't need that special someone to make you smile but it is a magical and amazing feeling that there's someone really cares for you. If you can't make yourself happy then how can you be assured when the right man comes, you can also make him happy?? As an add-on note, LOVE YOURSELF. It's the best thing you can give and do for the meantime. Stay positive and good luck to us in finding the right man of our dreams.

HAPPY LOVE MONTH! I may be single this season but I'm not lonely! Time to enjoy this love season with my cray cray friends and family! Have a love-filled day everyone!☺

Confused…YES! Assuming…NO!

It’s 1:03 am and I’m still up. I’m wide awake like an owl. Can’t sleep! Insomnia kicks in. There's something unnatural about this habit, yet I seem to always result to this. No plans for tomorrow. Rest is on its way. Couch potato time again.

So much for waiting for time to cease all foggy madness, I am now facing hard-core facts. I am just a puzzle of irregular sorts right now. So for now, just come up to write this one, sharing my thoughts. I just had a girl-ish mature conversation with ‘atey’ one of my close friends. To have this kind of discussion sometimes make us say that we’re growing up to the age that make us adults to understand this kind of things way much better. It takes a lot to know what life is. Sometimes we think of things the other way around. Simple actions that we may likely see something special on them yet it is just nothing. We can really assume on things that aren't real...we took it in a special way yet for others it's just quite as simple and ordinary. Warning...warning...warn…oh...warn yourself about those things that makes you assume on something...that in reality it was just NOTHING. Girls...do assume. I believe that! We are very assuming and most of the time fooled. We thought this and that, but actually there's nothing to think about because it's unreal. That’s why it’s connected into this word: CONFUSION. You face a bit of confusion on things. Some people saw it, and think about it, which made you THINK about it, too. With regard to impressing ladies, THE BEST WAY TO IMPRESS HER IS NOT TRYING TO IMPRESS. Remember, doing too much and going too far is not necessarily a good thing. Let time do its thing. Being sweeet is good, but being too sweet might not be a great idea. Therefore, small simple gestures can be much more effective than something big. I know there is a temptation to show and reward the lady that you like for who she is, but try to resist it - it will only do good to you.

I believe that everyone has expectations. Women expect too much of men, just as men expect too much of women. Unfortunately some come at a higher price than others. I'm a female and I know my worth but I don't let looks and stupid things define what I want in a man. ATTITUDE, CONSISTENCY, EFFORT, PERSISTENCE and PERSONALITY are important too! You have to step up your game and have conversation. You have to be able to interact. Communication is the key to everything and even the outside the world it still plays a major role. My conclusion: we can really assume or not?? I don't know yet if it's real or not but it’s a way wiser to think that it's not. It's wiser to guard our heart. To choose not to think about it anymore and realize that yes, there are other things to think other than that. Though I'm still confused and bothered about the truth...yet it's safe to say that: ASSUME NOT! ;)

Luxurious sleep should be attained as well, to promote a healthier lifestyle and a paced heart. So, I shall retire. :) Off to the mattresses I go! ;p Good mornight everyone! **Sorry for this post kinda like “sabog” and for some grammatical errors…too sleepy to recheck it. Hehe

The One that Got Away

I just thought that this would be nice to share...

So true, so real! It makes sense. Worth reading!

In your life, you'll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There's the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you're with...and the one that got away.

Who is the one that got away? I guess it's that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn't fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending with someone, finding a long time partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without realizing it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn't matter who you're with, it just doesn't work. Small problems become big; inconsequential become deal breakers simply because you're not ready and it shows. It's not that you and the person you're with are no good; it's just that it's not yet right, and little things become the flash-point of that fact. 

Then one day you're ready. You really are. And when this happens you'll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it'll work because you're ready. It'll work because it's the right time and you'll make it work. And it'll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you're finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want and you've become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there's no telling when this day will come. Hopefully, you're single or be in a long-term relationship, or be married with three kids...it doesn't matter. All you know is that you have changed. And for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about. 

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they were here today?", "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?". The one that got away is - the biggest "What if?" you'll have in your life.

If you're married, you'll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're already with the one you're with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure, you'll think about him/her every so often, but it's alright. It's never nice to live with a "might have been," but it happens. 

Maybe the one that got away is the one who's already married. In which case it's the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you're old and gray and reminiscing.

But if neither of that is the case, then it's different. What do you do if it's not yet too late? Simple - find him or find her. The very existence of a "one that got away" means that you'll always wonder...what if you got that one? Ask him out to coffee. Ask her out to a movie. It doesn't matter if you've dropped in from out of nowhere. You'd be surprised, you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person who is your "the one that got away". You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won't make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it'll all just fall into place somehow. It  would be a great feeling in the end, to be able to say someone, "Hey you, you're the one that almost got away."

Source: Mark J. Macapagal (The Manila Times)

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Its strange how people just walkin' in and out of your life. When you thought that they are always going to be there...FOREVER and ALWAYS. In our life a whole chapter always begins, everything changes from time to people, nothing stays the same. The existence of that "one that got away" means for me that, if you know who is that person in your life...grab them, tell them and let them know before its too late. Tell him/her that you will loved and respect him/her forever and you're scared of getting old without them. 

So am I that person?? Kind of, no, maybe yes, I am. :)) Don't we all wish something "so good" could stay forever? Don't we all hope that happiness is there to stay? Just always remember that if you lose someone today, it means God has planned someone better is coming tomorrow.  I'm just a girl who saw through it all and I kinda figured out who my "one that got away" is. I'll just find him or he is looking for me maybe he is just out there from nowhere. How about you did you find your "one that got away"?? :P

"Don't be the one who searches, finds and runs away." - Paulo Coelho